Same girl from last post, and more college drama

...It gets worse the longer you think about it. I think I'll try tomorrow. Go over and ask her to join me for lunch... I don't know where. We had a party tonight at Tony's after the RHA banquet and I briefly thought about inviting her, but if she turned me down, that's the end of it. I can't ask her to lunch after that, after being turned down once. I don't know if there's a rule against it, but I just wouldn't. So I haven't blown up the whole situation yet, but time ticks away. Yeah, like a time bomb. I almost clipped the wire that would make it explode, but even having not, the timer continues to count. It's May 6th now, I don't even really have 2 weeks anymore. She said she moves out on about the 15th.
I wonder why, I continue to torture myself, what do I think I could possibly get out of this? Well, I think even despite her leaving so soon, there's something just transcendental about liking someone and them liking you back.
But I have to act soon, because there's another timer besides her departure date. Me. How I think about the situation, about her. The longer I think about it, the less rooted in reality my thoughts about it become, and the less able I become to plan a course of action most likely to end in a desirable outcome. The longer I let it go, the more convinced I become that this is gonna be just like the movies, because aside from a few "encounters", the media's presentation of romance is all I know, all I have to go off of. I have no talent for romance, or people skills in general; dealing with and understanding women is harder for me than most guys.
It hurts, you know, and it's gonna hurt well into the summer no matter what the outcome. But it's a good kind of pain; like I told a friend, this kind of pain is better than the usual pain of lonliness and despair.

Baja guys leave on Monday, or Tuesday. Either way, they're probably up in the shop right now, in the middle of an 18 hour shift getting the car done. I pity them, but don't feel too sorry because I've been there before, twice. In the last two years, this time of year has always found me up in the shop covered in grease and sweat, and pock-marked with burns and cuts. It makes me sad to not be there, but not so sad, because they decided that they didn't need me. And I hope that they wish I was there now, that revenge is the only consolation I could get out of the situation. Either way, I hope they do well. Maybe I'm not one of them, but that team has known some great engineers in the past - people whose legacy should be continued through the team's success. If they don't do well, then I hope that those who came before me can forgive me.